Sign of the Times

CLINT UPDATE
Clint has still not been to Carter’s since my letter and picture were taken down there. Upon talking to Carter further, it has been discovered that Clint and his friends in the past have apparently been absent from the shop for periods of time (though Carter says it has never been this long before). He has a phone number for a house that they used to live in (it has since been abandoned) and they apparently moved somewhere else in the area (though Mr. Carter doesn’t know where that is). Regardless, he is hopeful and, in fact, believes that the time is drawing near and that “it will soon be a time for celebration.” We are remaining hopeful as well (though it is not always easy). He will be found.
Any day could be the day…

Updates to follow…

SONG 31...may the time for celebration be soon...
____________________________________________________________
ONE MINUTE MORE

Maybe I’m mistaken
But the time is drawing near
May we reap the harvest
And celebrate the year

Is everything I’ve given
Enough to sway your heart
In that moment when you realize
What’s been evolving in the dark?

**CHORUS 1**
I imagine how you smile
I imagine how you shine
I imagine how you sparkle
In the blindness of my eyes
You’ve no idea
How I am shaken to the core
And I’d give anything for
One minute more

Maybe I am foolish
To hope for brighter days
But there’s no room to waver
When love won’t let you sway

Quiet in this moment
There’s a stillness in the room
As I watch for the results
To flower and bloom

**CHORUS 2**
May my faith be rock solid
May my light bleed through black
May my hope be the lifeline
Leading you back
You’ve no idea
How I am shaken to the core
And I’d give anything for
One minute more

Carelessly I leave…and I am broken
Desperately I breathe…and I am open…again
Now I must wait with patience unbent…

The universe is waiting
And, likewise, so am I
The gifts that are given
Return in proper time

Some things are stolen
Other things are lost
May I never walk away again
Now that I know the painful cost

**CHORUS 2**

You've no idea
I am shaken to the core
I…I would do anything for
One minute more

SONG 30...
____________________________________________________________
TIMING IS RIGHT

Another week comes to an end
Another week without a bend
But something feels different now
Must be something in the air

I wish I saw what now I see
But we can’t go back for free
I’d go straight through hell for you
But I’m already there

If you can find me…[let me know]2x
If you can see me…[let me know]2x
If you can feel me…[let me know]4x

**CHORUS**
Oh…give me something I can hold
Give me a sign or
Something that will show me I’m still
On the right track…on the right road
I am here ‘til you turn on the lights…
And the timing is right

Another week has come and gone
Seven days and another song
I never thought I could expend
So much energy

I get dizzy when I think of light
Vertigo…and it leaves me blind
I never thought I’d think so much
Of Tennessee

If you can hear me…[let me know]2x
If there’s a reason…[let me know]2x
If there’s an answer…[let me know]4x

**CHORUS**

[Hey, show me…show me]3x…a sign
[Hey, I am ready]3x…for sight
Hey, give me your smile…hey give me your heart
Hey, give me some of your time
[Hey, I am ready]3x…tonight

How many days will it take from us?
How many lives will that make for us?
Where will the stars be on the day
You return for me?

If you can find me..[let me know]2x
If you remember…[let me know]2x
I am waiting…[let me know]4x

**CHORUS**

SONG 29...Is that the magic number?
__________________________________________________________
HOLDING ON

Twilight finds me weak
On the edge where I might break
I can’t hold back the tears anymore
I let them fall behind closed doors

But even in the darkest place I know
I find I can’t let go
And so I whisper…

*Chorus*
Hold on…hold on…hold on…hold on…
I’m holding on…I’m holding on
I promise I won’t break
But if keep holding on
Promise me it’s not in vain…
And you’ll return someday

I force myself to stand upright
And wander out into the night
Copper ring around the moon…clearly
An omen of a wish that will come true

Even in such painful loneliness
I find I can’t give in
Someone whispers…

**Chorus**

Even if the world seems frozen
Even if the stars won’t shine
Even if this day seems fruitless
Even if I’ve lost my mind
Even if my luck seems tragic
Even if you’re miles away
Even if that place escapes me
You will never fade…

And even in such deep uncertainty
I find I still believe
And so I whisper…

**Chorus**

Hold on…hold on…
Hold on…hold on…
I promise I won’t break
If you’ll return someday

NO NEWS IS GOOD NEWS I GUESS...

Updates will follow (as soon as I know anything)...

MY TAROT READING IN SALEM – SPOOKY

I’ve never had my tarot read before. Over the past six months, I’ve been practicing reading other people’s. I also ask the tarot several questions about my own life each morning. Generally, the same cards come up for me again and again. So, when we were in Salem on Sunday, I thought to myself, “If there has ever been a time to get my tarot read, now is that time.” And yes, I did have a pressing question on my mind.

I immediately got a good vibe from the tarot reader. To start off, he asked me if there was a specific question that I was hoping to answer. I said “yes” and he asked me to tell him the gist of it so he would at least know the direction I wanted this reading to go. I said, “There is someone that I am trying to find.” That’s all I said.

He had me pick nine cards. And the most incredible part about all of it: they were all the same cards that come up for me over and over again in the readings that I do at home. But that’s not the spookiest part.

He said, “I like to tell people a little bit about what I pick up from them and the cards before we begin the real reading. You are a very old soul, though I’m sure you’re not surprised to hear me say that.”

I replied, “No.”

He continued: “Over the past year or so, there have been many people coming in for readings who I can tell are very old souls. And these people are here on earth in one final incarnation to complete one final thing. These old souls are leaving earth and will not return. Now, I don’t use this word very often and I don’t use it lightly. The word is ‘soulmate.’ The one you are searching for is your soulmate.”

It was obvious that this kind of knocked the wind out of me. He told me that he would go on with the reading and we would come back to this at the end.

He said, “You are very well suited for a career in the medical fields. But that’s not what you choose. You decide to choose something artistic. You have also come through a period of major change. But the death is behind you. Over the next four or five years, you will work to discover your true path. It will not always be easy, but you will figure it out. There are no warnings for you in the cards right now. But I suspect that had I done this reading for you a year or a year and a half ago, there would have been a warning for you there about a relationship and your health. But yet you have moved away somewhere and those things are better now.”

He continued: “Now, the one you are looking for. I gather that he is somewhere in the South. I could say Texas…Arizona…maybe Southern California.”

I replied, “I know that he is in Southern California.”

He said, “Well, I’m not going to tell you to stop looking for him, but even if you did, you would still find him. It would seem as though it were a coincidence, but yet you know there is not such thing. I see that the meeting is coming and appears to be coming quickly. I can’t tell you when, but it is very quick.”

He went on to tell me a few other things, including that he saw me living in Arizona sometime in the future. Not on the horizon for me right now, but I suppose one never knows.

I left the reading visibly shaken. The energy inside the room had been so strong. And here he confirmed everything that I had believed. And he barely knew me. It was quite incredible.

And now we are left with nothing to do but wait. Wait for the one to return…

Updates will follow.

A PREDICTION

I know that I once stated that I was done predicting the future (at least where the Clint situation is concerned).
That being said, it has been hypothesized that Clint will go back to Carter’s Auto while I am out of town in Boston.
It is the very irony of the whole situation that makes it all the more plausible. For example, the day I finally get the clue that I should take a letter and picture down to the garage explaining what was going on…is the day that Clint disappears (for 12 weeks at this point). So, doesn’t it seem “fitting” that he should return as soon as I leave??? (thankfully, I will only be gone one week, not twelve)…

Carter is well aware of this point. In fact, Carter’s the one who brought it up (before then, it had only been this little nagging thought at the back of my mind). But when Beth spoke to Carter at the end of last week, she told him that I was going out of town this week and just really wanted to meet Clint before I left. And Carter said, “Well, you know, he’s most likely going to come in here as soon as she’s gone…”

I do, however, have more than simple irony to explain my prediction…

Without going into too much detail, a series of major cosmic events are currently taking place. This began Sunday morning (3:20 est) when Jupiter finally went direct after being retrograde for several months and stationed for several days. Jupiter is always consulted when major life events occur. Additionally, when Jupiter goes direct, one should always look to what happened 7 months prior for an idea of what event will “turn around” during direct transit (in my case, an event that occurred seven months prior was my initial meeting with Clint).

In addition to Jupiter direct, Venus moved into Cancer on June 3rd (11:18 est). This indicates a very profitable time for dreams and wishes of love. Mercury also moves into Cancer on June 11th (3:03 est) which helps emotionally-charged messages of love and good-tidings hit their mark. On that same day, June 11 (22:30 est), Mars enters Aries (its home sign). This indicates power, will, and success. Altogether, a very profitable time, indeed…

From the beginning, we have always said that there was something about the timing of all of this…it is very likely that one (or a combination) of these cosmic events has something to do with it. I met Clint just as Jupiter was entering what we call the “retrograde zone.” Now, that Jupiter has stationed and begun direct again, the planet is essentially in just about the same position it was seven months ago, when we first met. Will the luck of Jupiter give me this second chance…to meet Clint again? Is that what this timing is all about?

That remains to be seen…

Carter has always been convinced that “this is all going to happen. We just don’t know when.” He seems even more convinced that usual that this is going to happen in the next week…I could have the surprise of my life when I get back to L.A. next Wednesday…
Oh Luck, be kind…

BOSTON...

64 hours left and counting...get ready...

SONG 28
________________________________

BIDING MY TIME

I gotta say it’s a beautiful day
But there are clouds in my sky
Hit the open road in my car
Lose count as miles pass by

Who…can break through all this haze?
Who…can drive away this grey?

**Chorus**
I will wait…
Waiting for him to arrive
One of these days, it will happen to me
We’ll reunite
‘Til then I’m just
Biding my time

In the valley, he is hidden from me
As shadows swallow my light
Ever present, I can feel him breathe
But I can’t find him tonight

Who…can fill me like he does?
Who…can kill me like he does?

**Chorus**

I’m thirsting for his light
I’m starving for his smile
My borders and boundaries dissolve
I close my eyes and fall…

After awhile, I lose track of the days
I need a jolt…I need a jump start
If he can fix a classic car
He should have no trouble fixing my heart

Who…can correct me like he does?
Who…can affect me like he does?

**Chorus**

Waiting for him to arrive
‘Til then I’m just passing the time
I’m waiting for him to arrive
‘Til then I’m just biding my time…

THE STORY BEHIND THE EMAIL

I was not clear with this story. And that has lead some to be very confused by what transpired over the weekend. The email posted was sent to me was from someone named Clint…not someone impersonating him. It just wasn’t the right Clint.

Here’s what happened:
In addition to our search through all of the auto body shops in this part of the San Fernando Valley, we also compiled “Clint lists.” Anyone who had been to our house in January would have seen these lists scattered all about the floor. Basically, they were lists of people named Clint (or Clinton) who lived in this area. I discovered that on yahoo search, you can do a person search by state, using just a first name. Hundreds of people came up in the California search, but we were able to narrow them down based on location and based on age (in some instances you are able to approximate the age of the person). Granted, this is not a complete listing and the person either has to list themselves or has to have a landline phone in their name that would be listed. So, it was entirely possible that he was not even one of these people. I, for example, have never had a landline phone or any utilities in my name, and am, therefore, next to impossible to search for. But we figured, if all else failed with the mechanic lists, we could start calling up some of these people just to see what would happen. I knew he was around the area of North Hollywood, so that was the first list we would use. There was a name on the list: Clint Borden. One night I dreamed that this, out of all the names, was his name. So, the next day, Beth and I drove to North Hollywood to drive by the house and see what it looked like. There were several pick-up trucks parked outside (including a couple of white ones and as Beth has always said, only mechanics drive white pick-up trucks). There were also several really old cars parked out front, and in most instances, these are the kind of cars owned by mechanics because in order to have a really old car, you really need to know how to fix it. So, this looked like it could be our guy.

Finally, one day in January, I got up the nerve to call the house. No one picked up. The answering machine said: “This is Clint. Leave me a message.” So, I left one. I explained who I was and who I was looking for. I said, “I don’t know if you are the right Clint. If you are, call me back. If you’re not, I’m sorry to have bothered you.”

No one called back.

It was the next day we located Carter’s Auto. And once we had found that and confirmed with him that the Clint at Carter’s was probably our guy, we basically abandoned the “Clint lists.”

Then this past Friday afternoon, after Beth visited Mr. Carter, we drove around taking pictures of some of the significant sights in this story so we could post them on the www.findaclint.org website. These included: the sight of the first meeting, Carter’s Auto, The Black Broom (the pagan store Clint told me about), etc. It was when we were driving around in that neighborhood that Beth said, “Hey remember that house we thought he lived in? What was that guy’s name?”
“Borden,” I replied. “It was Clint Borden.”

“Well, we should take a picture of the house. It’s one of the Clint sights.”

So, we drove down Denny Ave one more time. Man, this house sure looks like the place where a young mechanic and all of his dudes and buddies might live. And I started thinking about it. What if it really was him and the message someone got erased or he never heard it or something? I mentioned this to Beth.

“I just wish there was some way we could find out for sure that it wasn’t him,” I said.

So, we devised a brilliant scheme. And we felt even if it turned out that this wasn’t him, what a great scene this was going to be in the movie.

On Monday, Memorial Day, we drove to North Hollywood. We drove to Ralph’s and bought some balloons and a little card to attach to them. The only balloons that didn’t have hearts or bears or something lame like that on them were American flag balloons. It was Memorial Day, afterall. The plan was that Beth would park the car on Denny Ave. Then, impersonating an FTD delivery person, she would walk up to the house to deliver the balloons. If Clint was there, she could then get a description of him. If he fit the description and she was pretty sure this was him, I would then go up to the door and re-introduce myself. If it was clearly not him, then at least we would know.

However, nobody answered the door, so Beth attached the balloons to the porch with a card that said: “To Clint. From a secret admirer. If you are interested in learning who this person is, please email her at: aislin_lumina@hotmail.com”

And that was that.

But that night, I received the email which was posted on the blog. Oh my god…could this really be him? I wrote back that I was searching for a Clint that I had met awhile back who was from Tennessee. I was hoping this was him.

Yesterday, he wrote back that he was not from Tennessee but that he had been there. He thought maybe he had told me that. He said he worked in the film and TV industry and meets lots of people. He told me that he believed in “random chances” and maybe this had all happened so he and I would meet.

That’s sweet. But he’s not the right Clint. My Clint really told me that he was from Tennessee. And he really told me that he was a mechanic. And though I do believe in “random chances,” I have to find the right Clint.

What is so important about this part of the story, however, is the fact that this random person…who is only associated with this story because he is a young man also named Clint living in North Hollywood…this random person WANTS to be the Clint we’re looking for. He WANTS to be part of the story. He WISHES that it was him we were looking for. Because at the end of the day, we all want to be part of something big. What this shows me is that if some random person who is not part of the story is so flattered and intrigued by all of this, imagine how the person who IS part of the story will feel…I imagine the “right” Clint will be even more flattered and intrigued.
We just have to hold fast to hope.

He will go back to Carter’s…

And speaking of Carter, on Friday Beth had a nice chat with him. Carter told her that he had learned from one of Clint’s friends that Clint had been out of town in Northern California on business. Apparently, he does something with computers. Now, of course, this is all translated through Mr. Carter, so we don’t really know exactly what this means and what it is he does with computers (for all we know, he may have been learning about building and repairing the computers in newer automobiles). But if he has been away learning this new job, that helps explain why he hasn’t been around the shop. But still, he has known Carter for many years. And he wouldn’t just decide to never speak to him again. He has to return at some point. Carter is confident of this.

And as Mr. Carter says, “You just have to be diligent. This will work out.”

Updates to follow…

SONG 27
___________________________

JUPITER

You wake up with your hungry eyes
Face another bloodshot sky
I guess the planets aren't quite
In place
Everyday I hope for news
To pinpoint your latitude
But everyday is just the same
No gain...

But do you really think you'd feel
Any better if you caved?
You'd always wonder what would be
Do you really think you'd feel
Any better if you stayed?
What you start, you must complete

NOW, YOU FEEL THE FORWARD DRIFT
BACKWARD MOTION'S SUDDEN SHIFT
JUPITER RETROGRADE
JUPITER DIRECT TODAY
MAY MY LUCK CHANGE
MAY MY LUCK CHANGE
TODAY...

Suddenly, you're no longer stuck
A stone once wedged in mud breaks free
And the current carries you
Away
Wild rapids transport you
To a destination new
Where you're rewarded for your time
And pain

Did you really think you'd be
Always running in one place?
You have got to have more faith
Did you really think you'd be
Treading water in one place?
You got to have more faith

NOW, YOU FEEL THE FOWARD DRIFT
BACKWARD MOTION'S SUDDEN SHIFT
JUPITER RETROGRADE
JUPITER DIRECT TODAY
MAY MY LUCK CHANGE
MAY MY LUCK CHANGE
MAY MY LUCK CHANGE
TODAY...

Jupiter retrograde
Jupiter turns direct today
May my luck change
Today...